Hunky

Oh Hunky. He was (in my eyes) the lushest thing on tinder up to that point. Like you get really hot ones. Very facially appealing men. But as I have said many times now pretty isnt really my thing. A rugged dude with naughty eyes and a cheeky smile will get me everytime.

I go on about what I find attractive a lot in these posts and I've realised that it's because before I was dating I didnt think about it too much. In the past I had always just met men naturally and been won over or enamoured by who someone was. I really go hard for that seeing people stuff. You can absolutely read someone if you pay attention. People cannot fake who they are in real life (not for too long anyway) If you ever find your self tindering then you will notice that you have to start really judging people on 2D photos and then later finding out in person what actually keeps that initial attraction fizzing.

Loads of girls go crazy for Mr Grey. Now whilst I wouldn't push J Dornan off if he asked, I would jump across him like he was nuthin if T Hardy was also in the vicinity and feeling frisky. Hunky was a mix of the two, but mostly he reminded me of our Joey M.

Twit-Twoo <3

Hunky was an ex-professional rugby player (originally from cardiff with only the softest of welsh twang left in his tone) He still played for a London team on weekends and now taught rugby in a private school in South-East London. He had added me on instagram via tinder and I fell in love scrolling through his pics. Wow-eee I thought. I hope he's not just a beefcake with no chat. And he really wasn't.

Just the right mix of jokes, questions and flirtiness. Over the week I started actually looking forward to his texts. You can get to a point with dating where you can barely be asked to check your phone. Especially if they are too texty.

"What food you eating little lady?"

"Can't talk - busy munchin"

But Hunky was cool. He suggested meeting in Lewisham at the Makers Market on a Friday after work. Now if you know London try not to laugh. My instant reaction was WTF. "Lewisham? Is he stunted?" But asking around the office the Makers Market got great reviews.

If you live in Lewisham, soz - I am sure its not as rachet as I am making out (but it is).

It was such a warm summer last year and still hitting 27 degrees in late September, this meant I was still not having to wear much (#BornFree) And I set off that friday for the DLR from the East Village to meet him wearing my little date outfit. I had made a big effort to look like I had made no effort and stepping on to the train I walked past a guy tapping in who said, with absolutely no shame "Damn Gurl".

This happens a lot in London. Men aren't fussy or shy up here. Back home you might get the odd beep (off a man in a van your dads age who should know better) if you go out in something figure hugging. But in london? you will get eye-raped everywhere you go. I mean they do it to everyone, so I know I am not special. When you are single things like this will cheer you up sometimes though - unless they take it too far.

This guy came and sat opposite me as he got on the train. Asked "where you going looking like that?" (I was in ripped jeans and a fancy crop top)

"A Date" I said. Sliding my earphones in. He wasnt ugly, he just wasn't my type. Plus NO-ONE-TALKS on the under ground. Especially not before 11pm and even then its not often you will chat back. Chatty pants didn't stop though. He waved to get my attention, so I took an ear phone out and he proceeded to tell me all about how he was working security for a Krept and Konan gig that evening. "Nice" I said. Praying the train would speed up. He kept talking all the way to Lewisham at the end of the line and followed me out when we arrived. I prayed hunky would be waiting, and like a hero, he was: 6.3, dark-haired and stubbly, a solid 17 stone of sexy muscles aka #HotAsFudge. Mr DLR sloped off and as I leant up to kiss Hunky on his cheeky a warm smile spread over his face. We fell into step heading to the market and he kept bumping his arm into my bare one as we walked. I could feel all this tingly heat.

The Makers Market turned out to be even more awesome than everyone had said. You slip off the end of the poundshop riddled high street (Hunky paid for our tickets to get in) and you end up in this cute little square set back from the town. It's stall-to-stall with cocktail pop-ups and all the different kinds of hot and steaming street-food you could think to want to try (like a condensed and much more vibey version of Broadway market)

They have music Fridays and Saturdays where the DJ plays reggae and new and old remixes of favourites choons. It's just so relaxed and fun and the air is filled with the smell of so many yummy treats. There are trendy little tables and booths dotted everywhere to sit, eat and talk to new Hunky playmates on warm evenings. - It would also be a cool night out with your faves, or a good a spot as any to flirt with randoms.

Hunky treated me like a princess the whole night. Hand fed me sweet potato chips and I spoon fed him my peri-peri chilli. He introduced me to 'Dark and Stormies' (these yummy rum cocktails) and as the night wore on we ended up dancing to the reggae remixes like tipsy kids. I am only 5.3 and he kept bending to talk in my ear, putting his hands round my bare waist and asking if I was okay.

I kept smiling back and saying I was good. When I ducked out for a wee and came back to meet him at the bar, I could see a woman approach him. I was only a few feet away and she was slim and attractive. She put her hand on his arm and started flicking her hair. Immediately he looked round, we caught eyes and both smiled - she turned to follow his gaze. The woman grinned wryly at me as I approached, and as she passed me she slurred "well done".

Woah, I realised, he was so fit that women must approach him all the time!

I liked that he wasnt a man whore and after all the attention. He didnt owe me anything, but you could see he was house trained.

He had also mentioned during the evening that he was good at matchmaking amongst his friends but confessed he couldnt seem to find anyone for himself and had been single a year. "Bad break-up" he said. After setting his best female friend up with his flat mate (they were recently engaged) the couple had set him up a tinder profile.

"How are you finding it?" I asked

He looked a bit sheepish and said "yeah - it's alright"

"You must of had some bad dates though?" I prodded, smiling.

"Uh, well actually - This is my first tinder" he admitted.

"Hows it going?" I grinned.

"I'll let you know" he grinned back.

I love that bit at the start. When it seems like anything might happen next. All you know for sure is there are some sparks and that the person in front of you makes you giggle and tingle.

As the night drew to an end (there was no nighttube back then) we headed for the station. He was getting an overground and I was DLR bound once more. We walked past some guys scrapping on Lewisham high street as we exited the market.

Told you it was a snazzy part of town.

Hunky's arm was already tucked around my side, his hand resting above my bare waist but under my boobs, and he moved me in one smooth motion to the other side of him. I felt so protected being sheltered away from the kerfuffle and he pulled me tighter into his body as we walked, almost carrying me clean across to the other side of street away from the fight.

On the walk back he said some of the soppy things men say to women (he was tipsy too) and at the entrance to the DLR he pulled me gently in front of his body, bent down and slid his hands over the top of my bum. He groaned softly as I leant up on my tip toes into his kiss.

Afterwards I skipped off to the train smiling and he called after me asking me to text him when I made it home.

The messaging continued as the week went on and as I was off to Bali for a fortnight the following weekend, we made loose plans to meet when I got back. It didnt happen though.

Lessons learned

1) Sometimes the fit ones are not just pretty faces.

2) Things will work out if they are meant to.

3) The Makers Market is worth the trek to Lewisham (just keep your bag shut and don't make eye contact with anyone on the highstreet)

When I got back from Bali a few weeks later I messaged him back saying "Hey Hunky - what's shakin'?" The message never even blue ticked - So he is probably still stuck up a tree after trying to rescue a pussy (cat) and has no reception.

Either that, or he is with one of the hot little blondies who had crept into his insta snaps whilst I was away.

#TinderHadHimNow.